If, like so many professional procrastinators in this town, you didn't bother picking up a Pique promptly on Thursday, dithered about on Friday, went for a long bike ride on Saturday and finally got around to grabbing one on your way to Sunday eggs Benny, you're probably thinking, "What a nice sentiment; and how timely."
Well, not so fast.
In the normal course of business, you'd be right. Sunday is July 1st. July 1st is generally considered Canada Day. Canada Day is generally considered the national day of Canada, the day we celebrate, well, Canadian-ness, and/or the anniversary of the British North America Act of 1867 which magically united the three British colonies into — ta-da — Canada.
But you'd be wrong.
I'll explain in a moment. But now, it's question time. There is a long tradition in Canada's print media — Pique being no exception — of running How Canadian Are You, Eh?, questionnaires in the Canada Day edition. I've never stooped to... er, taking part in that sort of thing but I feel as though I should. So I will.
Question 1: What were the three colonies that "united" to form Canada in 1867?
a) Nova Scotia, New Brunswick and Quebec
b) Nova Scotia, New Brunswick and Ontario
c) Nova Scotia, Quebec and Ontario
d) None of the above
Answer: d; None of the above.
As you might suspect, this was a trick question. The three British North American colonies were Nova Scotia, New Brunswick and the Province of Canada. No, seriously; that's what the colony was called, the Province of Canada. It was divided into the provinces of Ontario and Quebec. So if you wanted to weasel you way into half credit for this question you might argue Canada was formed out of four provinces but there's really no room to argue in a multiple choice test so suck it up, buttercup, and give yourself no points for that question.
Now, you might be wondering exactly why this most revered national holiday is called Canada Day, that being, shall we say, a bit prosaic. Well, let's remember, especially since we're in British Columbia, this is a country of prosaic names. In this province alone we had so little imagination when it came to place names that we have a whole string of towns called things like 100 Mile House, which is, as you may guess, 30 miles up the road from 70 Mile House and 50 miles south of 150 Mile House. If you're an American tourist reading this, I'm not make it up and, yes, Canada did switch to metric but didn't have the heart to let the various Mile House towns in on the joke.
Canada Day didn't start out being Canada day any more than Canada started out being Canada. So....
Question 2: Canada Day was initially called what?
a) British North America Day
b) Dominion Day
c) Le Jour de la Confédération
d) Kingdom Day
Answer: b or c; you bilingual devil, you.
However, it may almost have been called Kingdom Day, hewing to the true north proclivity for prosaic names. When the BNA Act created Canada, important people in the new country lobbied Great Britain to deem the new country the Kingdom of Canada, owing to the "... monarchical basis of the constitution." As an aside — isn't this entire column an aside? — in 1867, the monarch of Great Britain was Victoria, who we honoured just last month by celebrating Victoria Day. If Victoria was the monarch and the bigwigs of Canada wanted to cement the monarchial basis of the country, why didn't they ask it be called the Queendom of Canada? Just askin'.
Regardless of the monarchial gender identification issues, Lord Stanley — yes, the one with the cup — who was British foreign secretary at the time, vetoed the idea of Canada being a kingdom, preferring instead the title Dominion. Curiously, or perhaps not, dominion can be broken down into its roots. (Do, meaning to perform or execute; to carry out, and minion, meaning an obsequious follower or dependent, a sycophant or subordinate official, especially a servile one.) I don't want to speculate what that might have said about the esteem in which the new country of Canada was held by the old country of Great Britain but it may explain a lot about our national psyche.
For example, it may explain why Canadians were lukewarm toward Dominion Day for a number of decades, why many Canadians continued to pretend they were really British and why the Queen of England is still on our money. But I digress; on to the main event.
Question 3: Canada Day is July 1st.
a) True
b) Usually
c) Not this year
d) I give up; just tell me.
Answer: b and c;
Stop whining; of course it was a trick question. Canada Day officially became Canada Day in 1982. Canada Day almost became Canada Day in 1946 when a Quebec MP's private member's bill sought to rename Dominion Day. While the bill passed the House of Commons, the Senate thought Canada Day was a dorky name and suggested The National Holiday of Canada instead, an even dorkier name. This goes a long way toward explaining the esteem in which most Canadians hold the upper chamber. The bill died and, yes, I digress.
Another private member's bill in 1982 succeeded... sort of. It was introduced on a day when only 12 MPs were present. Even in Canadian politics 12 MPs do not constitute a quorum. But no one called foul and under the rules, if no one objects to, say, changing the name of the national holiday without a quorum, you can get away with it. The bill passed in five minutes. The Senate objected but mindful of their own lack of imagination, passed the bill and the rest is history, which may explain the esteem in which most Canadians hold the lower house as well.
But it doesn't explain why Canada Day, 2012, is actually Monday, July 2nd instead of Sunday, July 1st, does it?
Well, it's like this. Canada Day is a federal, statutory holiday enacted under the Holidays Act. While it may exist forever in spirit on July 1st, in law it only exists on July 1st in years when that date falls on a Monday through Saturday. If July 1st happens to fall on Sunday — not to say the Lord's day — July 2nd is the legal holiday.
But hey, not like I'm going to get in the way of a good party. There'll be music and a parade and fireworks on Sunday in the village. And even though we'll be celebrating the eve of Canada Day, a party's a party, dude.
Happy Birthday, Canada.
