Maxed out 

The 2008 Maxies

The year before the year before the Olympics descend on our happy mountain home has truly been one for the record books. It began with buoyant news about rising home values and just kind of degenerated from there.

So many achievements, so few awards. But here they are, the 2008 Maxies, recognizing, as always, the noteworthy and dubious.


Life in Tiny Town

Best On-Mountain Improvement : I never woulda spent $52 million bucks on it — probably a failure of vision on my part — but if you pee standing up, it’s pretty hard not to be impressed by the Peak 2 Peak gondola. Great rides, great views and an opening celebration very, very well done. Oh yeah, and it came in on time and on budget. Maybe the muni should just hire Doug, Barb and Rick instead of the consultants they waste money on.

Nice Rabbit; Nice Hat: With the twin demons of weather and economy tag-teaming prosperity, the last thing Whistler and WB needed was a highly publicized lift failure. The only thing to do? Get it up and running in a week and a day. We owe you all a round.

Wow, You Can Dress ’em Up and Take ’em Somewhere : Bones, Binty and Flyboy are awarded the GG’s Medal of Bravery for their daring rescue of a kite skier testing thin ice on Green Lake. Never seen those guys in suits before.

Does That Come In Small : Whistler’s hottest new fashion statement hits the mean streets of Tiny Town this fall when fresh-faced seekers took to the bricks wearing sandwich signs desperately asking passersby, “Got Housing?”

First Prize — A Lifetime’s Supply of Gas : To the avenging logger, whomever he or she may be, who did more to singlehandedly beautify our town by chainsawing one of the hideous official Olympic signs near Creekside. Can you believe they replaced it with more wooden posts, dude?

Follow the Yellow Brick Road : To all the heartless tin men and women, a/k/a landlords, who are gouging renters, breaking the law by requiring months of rent up front and unconscionable damage deposits, cramming as many bodies into as few beds as possible and giving tenants the boot for Olympic gold. May your sex organs fall off and loathsome disease ravage your bodies, you bustards. Special mention to the operator in White Gold charging $1,100/month to each of three mates sharing that tiny bedroom… swine.


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