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Summertime questions for women riders: are you a Betty or a Veronica?

First women's only mountain bike ride to tear up park and west side on August 27
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"Damn you, Tony Horn. Damn you."

It's my steady mantra with each pedal stroke as I climb the cemetery hill. Until my front wheel starts spinning on gravel, my lungs revolt and my legs simply give up. I'm not even a third of the way up. The rest of the hill looms steeply ahead.

I start pushing my bike. Then the real cursing begins. This is just the first climb. There's more to follow. Not to mention trails like 99er and mid Danimal.

What have I gotten myself into?

Betty versus Veronica, that's what. Race guru Tony Horn's latest concoction.

Two weeks left until some 200 female riders tackle the west side trails in Whistler's first ever women's only mountain bike race. It begins with a downhill run in the bike park, followed a few hours later by 15-kilometres of cross-country.

Riders are either a Betty or a Veronica, divvied up into teams after answering Horn's questions upon registration. The idea behind creating the teams was to make the race less intimidating.

That's a good idea in theory but this is a Tony Horn ride after all and Horn's name is synonomous with epic bike races like the gruelling Samurai of Singletrack, the Four Jacks and the Four Queens. This will be no walk in the park (though to be fair, in my case, I could be doing a lot more walking than riding).

To say I'm out of my league is putting it mildly.

Not so, Tracey Howlett assures me.

"I've gone back and forth about dropping out," she says.

"I've cursed Tony's name up and down."

It's good to know I'm not the only one. Misery loves company.

Howlett ended up in Betty versus Veronica because Horn offered her a free spot as thanks for all her volunteer work with his previous races like the Samurai and her weekly Loonie race work.

Howlett's not really sure if a free entry spot was the thanks she wanted.

It certainly wasn't when she did an endo over her handlebars mid-Danimal during one of her pre-rides a few weeks back, spraining an ankle and getting four stitches in her hand.

"First time I've ever had stitches," Howlett says.

Do I detect a slight hint of pride?

Perhaps.

I've had my Betty versus Veronica war wounds too. My first ride up that cemetery hill followed with the slog up Scotia Creek almost killed me. So we decided to nip into Danimal North and head home. Not so fast. My legs were like jelly, my mind a little rattled. Next thing I knew I was face first in the dirt. Slow-motion endo off a bridge.

It wasn't my finest moment. And the right side of my face, grazed and burning from my forehead to my chin, wasn't pretty. It was a little awkward buying groceries at Nesters for a week.

The thing is, I was out there doing it. Not well. But doing it. And that counts for something. Right?

"Having these events that creep into your pysche a little bit, they force you to go out and ride," says Horn. "They get you out on your bike and for me that's one of the joys of this whole thing: think of how many girls that have never ridden those trails on the west side. And they might not go ride them again because some of them are too hard for them. But some of them, they might."

It's true. This is my first foray into the world of the west side. And I love it.

Don't get me wrong. The Scotia Creek climb I could always do without, particularly when lined with spectators, which is what Horn is hoping for on race day Aug. 27 to give it that Tour de France, Alpe d'Huez feel.

Horn is asking spectators to park on the Stonebridge Road and walk down the Scotia Creek climb. I'd be happier if there was no one there but... that's just me.

The climb is my Waterloo.

Danimal North and Beaver Lake Pass on the other hand - so much fun.

And, Horn tells me that 99er is within the realm of my possibility.

Maybe. One day.

It's become in the realm of Leslie Drenka's possibility.

She took a Betty and Veronica clinic with Sylvie Allen this summer, sessioning some of the harder sections of the trail.

"It was really good for building confidence and trying something that you might not attempt," says Drenka.

"I loved it."

She'd never been on 99er until that day and can now ride some of the trickier rock faces and the steeper rootier sections.

Horn says there are a lot of great riders signed up. Maybe not the top names in Whistler but girls who can ride the whole course and not get off their bike once.

"There's lots of those people," says Horn.

I didn't really need to hear that, I reply.

When asked why he does these rides, events that take countless hours and organization, yet for which Horn receives no payment, he said it's simple.

"For me personally I really think that what we have in Whistler with WORCA, and the Loonie Races and everything, is a really special thing," he said.

"And it's something that doesn't happen in a lot of places in the world. And I think sometimes you've got to work for that and so I don't mind giving time to something that I really love."

He laughs off that he has the finger on the pulse of mountain biking in Whistler but he may be on to something here.

Betty versus Veronica sold out in nine days, with a waitlist filling almost immediately.

Women have been out riding the course with their boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, dogs, whomever will go with them.

"It's inspiring to see everyone doing this," he says.

"For me, this has brought a lot of joy into a year that has been challenging (for the mountain biking community), which has been really special for me. I'm stoked about it."

On yet another pre-ride this weekend there was more talk about how to dress the part for the race than how we're going to ride it.

Blond wigs for Bettys, dark for Veronicas, cheerleading skirts, shiny bling.

There was also talk that some of the top riders will be doing the course in less than two hours. That does not bode well for me.

But I'm taking my cues from Howlett.

"My goal is to finish and have fun," she says.

That shouldn't be a problem.

There's a party set to end all parties at the Squamish Lil'wat Cultural Centre following the race, complete with martinis to ease those aching muscles and a silent auction to remember why we're really doing this race. All the money raised is going to the Howe Sound Women's Shelter.

So really, when you think about it, what I should be saying is:

"Thank you, Tony Horn. Thank you."

I think....