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Talkin' shop with Mr. Lahey and Randy

Trailer Park Boys characters to perform at Black's on Valentine's Day
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In this year of our lord 2012, it's practically treasonous to have ignored the Trailer Park Boys this long. The series, which ran from 2001 to 2007 on Showcase and spawned two feature-length films, is one of the most successful Canada has ever produced. For good or ill, the shenanigans of Ricky, Julian and Bubbles have a special place in this country's cultural sphere, and it's something everyone is just going to have to live with.

The show's primary antagonists, Jim Lahey, the alcoholic party-pooper superintendent of Sunnyvale Trailer Park, and his sidekick/lover, the cheeseburger-addicted Randy are coming to Whistler for a round of stand-up shenanigans, a little song singing, possibly some Shakespeare and a lot of general foolishness.

Pique caught up with Mr. Lahey and Randy, known in real life as John Dunsworth and Pat Roach, while on the road for the first day of their cross-B.C. tour to discuss the international success of the show, the follies of rock and roll and about giving up cheeseburgers for dry, butter-less toast. Enjoy.

Pique: Was this a type of show you ever thought you'd be a part of?

John Dunsworth: No, I used to teach my students not to use bathroom humour because it was the lowest form of humour and here I am talking about shit all the time.

Pique: It's going on five years since the show ended. What do you think about the show now, looking back at the success of it?

JD: Well, I'm hoping we're going to do some more.

Pique: Are more episodes in the works?

JD: Everyone keeps their cards real close to their chest so I'm not going to show you my hand. I just hope. Actually, I do Hope. I'm in Hope right now.

I'm doing another series right now called Haven, which is on Showcase, and we're going into our third year. I've been doing lots of acting in films and specials with Jonathan Torrens. I worked with Michelle Williams last year, I worked with a lot of really great actors, world famous people in my life and I feel very fortunate for the whole thing. Randy and I are touring because it's so much fun and we make a little bit of money. Not a lot but it's like a vacation.

Pique: So are you touring just for the fun of it then?

JD: I'll put it to you this way. Can you imagine going to London, England, and playing in the O2 and then living on a double decker bus for a week and going all over Scotland, and then going to Dublin and then having a packed house everywhere you go. People are laughing their heads off and you're getting paid to do that.

Can you imagine anything more fun? Free liquor everywhere. Too bad I don't drink because if I did, I'd be a drunk.

Pique: Are Canadian fans any different than fans elsewhere in the world?

JD: There's no appreciable difference. I made a travelogue when I was there and we're going to put it on the Internet very soon. But you'll see that though the accents are different, (they) have the same passion, the same intelligence and the same joy.

Trailer Park fans are basically liberal-minded loving people who understand the humour. The humour isn't about putting people down, it's based on a community that works together and it is a loving community. No one loves Ricky, Julian and Bubbles — I mean, even I gave Ricky mouth-to-mouth resuscitation (on the show) to save his life.

Pique: So you recently joined Guns 'n' Roses on stage in Halifax. What was that like?

JD: I'm not impressed with rock and roll myself. When it's done well, I like it but I don't like the grinding — the 110 decibel bombardment of the senses when you go into modern-day clubs. I mean I like the Moody Blues. I like the Beatles. I like the old Tom Waits. I like Leonard Cohen. I like things that are subtle and have changeups and are thoughtful. There are a lot of things that are just repeating. Nine out of 10 songs you hear on the radio, you know (impersonates a rock and roll singer) "I take my roooooocket launcher! I take my roooooocket launcher!" You know, it's just a repetition of a very uninspired libretto matched with a traditional since-1965 bang, bang on the drums and it never lets up. The guy on the guitar doesn't know when to f---ing quit.

Pique: So why did you decide to join the band on stage then?

JD: Look, I can't say that my commitment to rock and roll doesn't involve working with rock and roll bands sometimes. I was invited to go there and surprise Axl Rose. Mike Smith, or Bubbles, asked me if I would go because Axl Rose wanted to meet me, so I went as a surprise guest. He did not know that I was going to be on stage.

I mean, I love stuff like that. I'll go to anything. I'll do black tie (events). I'll do silent auctions. You ask me to do something, I'll do it. I'll teach. I'll work with sex offenders. I'll work with anybody and spread the joy of performance. I believe that when you're an actor and you learn that your body and your voice is all that you have to work with, and if you realize that you're in control, you can project any character you want. I think it works in your real life. I think that you really can shape your future by the way that you act.

Pique: How did the Randy and Mr. Lahey tour all come about?

JD: Someone asked us if we'd do a show and we did it. People stood up and clapped and we thought, 'Oh, they like us!' So we've never said no.

Pique: Is it all improvised or do you have set pieces?

JD: We have a whole bunch of set pieces that we just pull out per show. Whatever feels right we just go with. We can go for five hours. Actually sometimes, we go half an hour on a 45-minute set. Sometimes we go an hour and a half and we don't even know it because the audience needs us bad.

Pique: What's it like meeting these hardcore, dedicated fans of the show?

JD: I just wrote a script with a fellow from Texas and I just shot it last week. Three of my daughters and myself are in the movie and there are fans flying up from California to see us in Vancouver. When we were in Toronto there was a whole busload of people that came up from the States to see us. It boggles my mind why they would do that because I've never gone anywhere to see anything. I make my excitement around me. I've been to two concerts in my life and one was with Pat last year —The Police because I really like Sting. Pat's right here, do you want to say hi to him? Ask him some questions. (Passes the phone to Roach).

Pique: I was just talking to John about meeting diehard Trailer Park Boys fans. Have you had any strange experiences with hardcore fans?

Pat Roach: I think meeting any fan is a strange experience but we've become friends with a lot of these guys. I mean Rush's Alex Lifeson is a huge fan of the show and now he's a friend of everybody's (on the show). It's kind of weird. I remember going to see him in concert. I was 15 years old seeing Rush in Halifax. It was unbelievable and all of a sudden this guy (is a buddy). I remember bringing him my CD for him to sign and he had about 15 pairs of Randy pants he wanted to give to people. I said, "What is going on here? I'm signing more stuff for Alex Lifeson than he is for me. What's wrong with this picture?"

Pique: What do you owe the success of the show to?

PR: I'd say probably the success of the show was the television medium. If there were no such thing as TV, the show would not be a success.

It was right around the time when reality television was starting to come out. I don't know how (Trailer Park Boys creator) Mike Clattenberg ever came up with the documentary style but there were people who watched that show and thought that it was real. So, that's flattery when you're doing a mockumentary. Everyone knows one of those guys. Everyone knows someone like that, I guess, somewhere in the world, someone who drinks too much, someone who pisses himself, someone who eats too many cheeseburgers, someone who bangs too many people.

Pique: Did you actually have to eat all those cheeseburgers?

PR: The worst time I remember was an early morning scene... and I was eating a cheeseburger at seven in the morning and they had the bright lights on me like it was meant to be suppertime. I had just finished eating a nice breakfast sandwich with bacon and egg and all this stuff on it. I wasn't hungry at all and I had to eat all the cheeseburgers at 7 a.m. That was hard.

Pique: Did the producers request that you had to keep the belly? Was that part of the contract?

PR: Yeah, well they did and then one year Randy went to jail with Lahey because the bank machine blew up all over us. We got blue (with the dye) and we got chucked in jail because those recalcitrant, recidivist reprobates put us there and I was sitting there working out in my cell. Mike Clattenberg said, 'Pat man, maybe next year when you come back Randy should be buff, you know, like you've been working out in prison.'

So I went on a diet. I cut all the grease out. I wasn't even putting butter on my toast. Dry toast! I dropped about 20 pounds. Mike saw me and said, 'Holy shit, what the f--- happened to you?' I said, 'Well, you said come back buff.' And he said, 'Well your gut's way too funny and we can't lose the gut.'

So I immediately went back to grease. It tastes really bad the first week and then the second week it's unbelievably good. I got right in there. But the first fry that I had tasted so greasy. My stomach turned so I had a second. Every one was a little bit less (awful). But before, I was drinking with the boys and there were no donairs afterward. It was a dry piece of toast (instead). That's not fair.

Pique: So you won't be going on any more diets then, I guess.

PR: Yeah, I should be because I got to live. Once you get to a certain age, all of a sudden the cheeseburgers will catch up with you.