September 18, 2009 Features & Images » Feature Story

8 ways to get her to come out and play 

A girl’s guide for guys looking to build that hardcore relationship

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Slowly but surely he pushed and got his way. After a few months of gently educating her on the sport, and telling her how much fun it could be for them to ride together, he actually convinced his wife to do this ride with him and many others too. He approached the subject slowly and patiently so she didn't feel pressured. When they went out the first couple times, although my dad wanted to ride a Century, he kept it simple. He didn't push too hard, and didn't rush her into trying anything. He let her make it her idea because after a while of gentle asking, she gave in and let him take her out.

 

Just the other day, I went mountain biking with my new man. I realized how challenging it can be for two people who care about each other to do something that pushes the comfort zones of the relationship. We were riding some pretty simple trails around Lost Lake having a nice time. He is a seasoned rider, and probably has about 20 years on my three times out ever. I'm in good shape and was able to keep up with him physically, but not mentally. He was riding circles around me showing off, peacocking left and right (does this sound familiar to any of you?). I thought it was cute and kept riding. After about an hour of "easy riding" his excitement got the better of him and he started pushing me to do some more serious stuff without considering how I felt.  He should have sensed my hesitation (but didn't) and after five minutes he talked me into dropping into the hairiest, most narrow crevice I have ever seen (ok, so it was pretty much a gravel trail with a bit of a dip, but that's how I saw it). I didn't want to let him down so I obliged his heeding, and bit the bullet.

After about two seconds in, I found my normally composed self calling him an a-hole, feeling very emotional about the whole thing. I was upset, frustrated and angry with myself that I wasn't able to keep up with him because he was so excited, feeling I would be letting him down if I couldn't do it.

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