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Best of Whistler 2004 (Subjective)

Best home hangover cure

One Tums, two Motrin and a 500mL of juice.

Strangest promotion Pique received in the mail

We’ve received Melba Toast, Welch’s Grape Cocktail, organic dot-com beer, and a New York Dolls concert DVD, but the strangest promotion so far has to be two litres of tetra packs with beef, chicken and vegetable bullion from Knorr.

Worst reason to stay away from Whistler

Being offended by something G.D. Maxwell wrote about the current Bush administration. If you’re going to get turned off on an entire resort because of a little satire from our resident shit-kicker, then you really need to get some thicker skin. People offend too easily these days – a shame because people and politics are generally more offensive.

Words and phrases we’re getting sick of hearing

Olympics. Sustainability. Marginal Conditions. We’re sending you to Vancouver to see a specialist. Low hanging fruit. Sick.

Most pervasive local legend

That Whistler was called London Mountain until it was changed to Whistler. It did appear as London Mountain once on a 1928 map of Garibaldi Park, but only because the London Mining Company had a claim up there – locals have always called it Whistler after the whistling sound the local marmots make.

Worst breakdown of the group dynamic

Powder days are just not suited to large groups with diverse opinions, personalities and abilities. You need to come to the mountain with a plan in mind these days – lift A to run B, lift C to run D – to have a decent shot at the deep stuff. With a permanent population of 10,000 locals and probably twice as many second home owners, there are almost no secret stashes anymore – timing is everything.

Worst place to have a mountain bike mechanical

The halfway point on Comfortably Numb – turning back means heading to the Wedgemount parking lot, about 10 kilometres north of the village, and going on means hiking your bike for another two hours. You should be at least as prepared for this trail as you are for a terrorist attack – duct tape, rations, drinking water, and, depending on the time of day you set out, a flashlight. A good knife isn’t a bad option either, after a cougar chased a group of mountain bikers last summer on the Flank Trail.

Best excuses to stay in

In Whistler it’s always someone’s birthday, or going away party, and friends are always visiting and ready to cut loose. It’s hard to say no, but you have to sometimes unless you want to spend every cent you make on restaurants, bars and cabs. To help you out, here’s a list of plausible Whistler excuses that are guaranteed to get you off the hook. Cut them out and tape them on the wall beside the phone.

• "I think it’s that Asian thing or something (cough, cough), I couldn’t hear what the doctor was saying through his mask – anyway, the doctor said I’m probably still contagious."

• "I’d love to go but my neighbours were up all night partying, and I got like two hours of sleep – I can barely keep my eyes open, and I have to work a double tomorrow."

• "I fell on my ass in the park the other day and I’m on serious painkillers right now – I can barely walk."

• "That’s tonight? Oh man, I thought it was next Thursday! I have a (First Aid / Serving It Right / Conflict Resolution) class I gotta take for work."

If all else fails, honesty is always the best policy.

• "Look man, I’d love to come out but this is my (third birthday / second going away party / fourth stag and doe party) in the last two weeks, my brother’s flying out next week, and I don’t have two nickels to rub together. I’m worried I won’t even be able to cover rent." If you pull this off with the right gravitas your friends will take pity on you and could offer to pick up your tab.

Best letter-writer

Keep ’em coming! Without a doubt the most read section of Pique Newsmagazine is the letters section. Don’t think we’d be as bold as to presume that it’s the news, sports, columns or entertainment you flick to first. No! It’s the letters that keep coffee shops abuzz throughout the valley. And when the debate continues week after week, people go wild. Keep the letters coming guys. And though our letter writers come from near and far, though the subjects range on a variety of topics, from pissed off Max readers to community thank yous, Pique would not be the same without its letters.

Honourable mentions should go to Bjorn Gimse, who seems to be reading and responding to from a variety of locales, and Al Eaton. But let’s give Bob Lorriman his due for his thoughtful and controversial letters this year. He not only kept the community entertained and informed, he also kept muni hall on its toes. Thanks for caring Bob!

Best move from Whistler-Blackcomb

It’s not the unbelievable 1,100-acre terrain expansion or the summer, and winter, grooming of Peak to Creek that has us giving kudos to Whistler-Blackcomb. Instead, let’s talk about the fact that Whistler-Blackcomb DID NOT raise the price of its Spirit Passes this year. In fact, after years of steady increases, Whistler-Blackcomb LOWERED the prices of the spirit passes. And they kept season’s passes at the same price. Great news for Whistler employees. But their best move this year was the deal for Sea to Sky students. All students enrolled in school from D’Arcy to Squamish can get an unlimited ski pass for $299. Way to go Whistler-Blackcomb! This was your biggest and boldest move yet!

Biggest concern

Global warming. Because we made it a lot worse and now we can’t stop it. Now we have to find ways to live with it. The good news is that there’s plenty of things we can do to alleviate the problem.

Best terrain feature

Peak to Creek and the terrain past Spanky’s Ladder rule in the winter but we can’t wait to see what Freight Train looks like next summer in the bike-park. Imagine how sensational it’s going to be to pin it down "an A-Line type track" from the top of Garbanzo to the water hoses at the bottom of the mountain? Sicccckkkkkk.