By Rob Brezsny
ARIES (March 21-April 19): "When the first settlers
arrived in the New World, they were terrified by the vast open spaces,"
says Peter Anastas in the film
Polis Is This
. "They wanted to remake this unkempt paradise into a big English
garden." This is a scenario you should NOT imitate in 2007, Aries. Wander
out into the unknown with a cracked grin and a wild heart. Let it work its
elemental magic on you. Don't be too eager to turn the frontier into a comfy
hang-out.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Though millions of other people may
be flirting with glamorous badness and crafty nastiness in 2007, I bet you'll
have a minimal attraction to negativity, no matter how interesting it might
allegedly be. Drama kings and drama queens may try to seduce you into the crazy
chaos they stir up through their addiction to pain, but you'll be pretty immune
to their temptations. Seemingly reasonable people might hope you'll buy into
their gloom and doom, but you'll be too smart for that. Congratulations in
advance for your determination to be free of the stupid suffering that so many
people love to entertain themselves with.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): "Dear Rob: Did you ever hear of
that monstrous experiment in which a monkey actually died from lack of touch? I
often feel like that poor creature. For a while I thought I was being selfish
to want more love, but now I'm sick of that idiotic intellectualized
self-denial, and refuse to pretend I'm a self-sufficient saint who can go through
life feeling a chronic grey bathwater haze of half-assed passion. Is there any
hope? -Deprived Gemini." Dear Deprived: Good news! The possibility that
you'll be inundated with love is higher in 2007 than it has been for years.
Here are two tips to make it more likely that you'll be in the right places at
the right times to capitalize: (1) Make yourself supremely lovable; (2)
increase your capacity to give love.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): I nominate you to be the zodiac's
most successful complainer in 2007. According to my analysis of the omens, you
could excel at formulating brisk critiques and constructive dissent. You may
even have a genius for bringing the bracing intelligence of the heart to bear
on situations that are paralyzed by mind games. If you manage to fulfill the
potential I'm prophesying, you'll set in motion far-reaching ripples of
benevolent change. More power to you, Cancerian! May your grumbles and squawks
and protests be imbued with lyrical persuasiveness.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): My beautiful and talented Leo friend
Alisha had a traumatic experience early in her romantic history. At age 17, she
fell in love with the garbage man who hauled away her family's trash every
Saturday. Through her persistent efforts, the two of them started dating, even
though her parents hated his surly vulgarity, his permanently dirty
fingernails, and the fact that he couldn't read. After a whirlwind affair,
alas, he broke up with her. Ever since, even as Alisha has learned to make
better choices, she has carried the tragicomic embarrassment of having been
dumped by a mean, illiterate garbage man. But I predict that in 2007 she'll be
healed: Delightful adventures in love will utterly expunge that old twinge.
Moreover, I believe many of you Leos will find comparable romantic redemption.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In Kabbalah, the tree of life is the
primary symbol of the universe. In Norse mythology, the World Tree links heaven
to earth and shelters all living things; beneath it lies a magical well with
water that confers special powers on those who drink it. The ancient Chinese
spoke of a peach tree that bore a single fruit once every three millennia, and
provided immortality to anyone who ate it. In the mythic tradition of modern
science, trees have a crucial role in maintaining the ecological health of the
planet. I mention all this, Virgo, because in 2007 you'll benefit tremendously
from deepening your relationship with trees—both the actual and mythical
kinds. Get to know them better. Learn from them. Plant some. Put a picture of a
favourite tree on your altar. Hug one now and then.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): According to
The Onion
newspaper, the Catholic Church has abolished the
traditional "blessed" status of the meek. The new official story is
that the meek shall
not
inherit
the earth. One Church official was quoted as saying, "Everything about the
meek, from their quiet demeanours to their utter lack of can-do spirit, goes
against Church philosophy." I can't confirm the accuracy of
The
Onion's
report, but it does underscore a
point I want to drive home to you in 2007: It'll be a favourable time for you
to get tough with the docile, submissive aspects of your own psyche. Humility's
fine; that can stay. But you should take aggressive measures to lose any
tendencies you might have to be passive. Capitalize on the fact that events in
the coming months will help you tap into reserves of courage that have
previously been inaccessible.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): In 2007, you'll need to find the
power to do the half-right thing when it's impossible to do the totally right
thing. To help you do that, remember this advice from Abraham Lincoln:
"The true rule, in determining to embrace or reject anything, is not
whether it have any evil in it; but whether it have more of evil than of good.
There are few things wholly evil, or wholly good. Almost every thing is an
inseparable compound of the two; so that our best judgment of the preponderance
between them is continually demanded."
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Not everything you feel in 2007
will be new, but you'll have a lot more novel emotions than in a typical
year.
Not everything you do will
be creative and imaginative, but I suspect you'll often be improvising your way
smartly through experiences that have no precedent. You may not be relentlessly
reinventing yourself, but I bet you'll be imitating your old shticks and tricks
less than you ever have before.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Your sins are pretty mild,
Capricorn. Still, you have from time to time violated some of your own highest
standards; you have on occasion failed to live with impeccable ethical
integrity. That's the bad news. The good news is that in 2007 you will have the
best chance ever to atone for past mistakes. If done well, your corrective
actions will win you a permanent vacation from the hell that those mistakes
have sometimes trapped you in.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): There are still places in China
where plagues of locusts periodically descend in Biblical proportions. A few
years ago, farmers in the region of Xinjiang fought back, gathering an army of
10,000 chickens in anticipation of the invading hordes. The bird soldiers were
trained for two months, and when the showdown came, they acquitted themselves
admirably. This vignette is an apt metaphor for a challenge you'll face in
2007. While in general the year should bring an abundant amount of sweet luck
and high adventures, there will be a locust visitation or two. I urge you to
assemble your own personal equivalent of a chicken army. What might that mean,
practically speaking? Here are some possibilities: (1) Be well-prepared for
natural anomalies. (2) Ally yourself with the enemy of your adversary. (3) Get
others to help you fight your battles.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): You're not wearing a chastity belt
right now, right? You don't have on shoes that are so tight that they constrict
your sense of adventure? And please tell me you're not lugging around toxic
beliefs about the impossibility of experiencing authentic joy in this
"sick, twisted, miserable world we live in." But if by chance you
have
victimized yourself with any of the debilitations I
just named—or any other form of self-torture for that matter—please
take this opportunity to unburden yourself. The time has come for you to
explore the mysteries of pleasure, happiness, and outright euphoria. I hope
that in 2007, you will fully exploit the new title I now anoint you with: Bliss
Warrior.
To check out my expanded audio previews of your long-term destiny in 2007, go to http://RealAstrology.com.