Skip to content
Join our Newsletter

Is Whistler ageless?

"Today's younger generation is no worse than my own. We were just as ignorant and repulsive as they are, but nobody listened to us." - Al Capp
65988_l

One afternoon while I was hanging out on a local patio, a group of people not much older than myself strolled by and some 20-somethings at the next table referred to them as 'geezers.' Geezers!

I had always thought Whistler was a sort of melting pot where everyone regardless of age and nationality all melded into one happy, active, good looking and yes, ageless society. Was I wrong?

After quickly running to the bathroom to check my appearance, I was relieved to see that I didn't look THAT old. But the fact is, I'm middle aged dammit. Bring on the diapers.

It's frightening. Just when my peers got through the rash of 40th birthdays, the 50ths are cropping up like a mushroom cloud.

The sayings 'Age is just a number,' and 'You're only as old as you feel,' give me little comfort. I've always been overly concerned with age and not achieving my goals in a timely manner (ie: Fitness- still elusive).

Of course age is all-relative. I was once referred to as a young'un on an island up the coast populated heavily by retirees. I was so tickled that I now spend my entire summers up there, feeling young and dewy.

Looking back on my birthdays, I remember being ecstatic on my 19th birthday, legal drinking age, but then felt old when I turned 20, but then happy again when I turned 21, U.S. legal. Thirty didn't bother me but 35 did. At the time I was very concerned that gardening and golf interested me. Now at the ripe-ish age of 48, (wow, am I brave!) I find myself in the liquor store smirking while watching a 12-year-old get carded. The smirk is quickly extinguished when the little snot nosed infant turns out to be 25. And a doctor.

 

" Each generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one that went before it, and wiser than the one that comes after it."

George Orwell

 

Since the beginning of time, it seems every generation carries some disdain for the other. Stereotypes being that old people are slow and square and young people are lazy, undisciplined and have things way easier than the generation before it.

Worried that I too would start sounding like my parents: "When I was your age, I had to walk 20 miles to school in a snowstorm....blah blah," I thought back to my own hardships when I moved to Whistler in the 80's. You know, the olden days when you had to hike to 7th Heaven and there was no such thing as a high-speed quad. At the time I felt adult and worldly, until the restaurant I was supposed to work at burned down, there was a brutal cold snap and I couldn't get to the crappy little place I had rented in Emerald. Soon I was on the phone crying to my mommy and daddy, like a 5-year-old, asking for money.

I was told, "No you can't have any money! You decided not to go to university and live in that silly ski resort. You made your bed, lie in it - if you can get there! Ha!"

These days if that happened, the young adult would call their parents via cell phone, rather than having to find a pay phone AND change, the parents who couldn't muster up a 'no' would transfer the money immediately to their progeny's bank account, which could be accessed that instant with a bank card. Then the young, spoiled little brat could then take transit to their crappy little place in Emerald.

When I asked some 20 year olds if their parents topped up their bank accounts, they all denied it, but then usually added that 'their roommates parents did'.

I mean how much easier is that? How can kids these days even think about whining?

But then I asked my older friends who are in their 60's what would have happened to them in a similar scenario, they said I was incredibly fortunate to be able to access a phone at all, they would have had to send the 'please send money' message to their parents by donkey, and their crappy place in Emerald wouldn't have had an indoor toilet, or any plumbing for that matter. Because, my friends explained, "Water wasn't invented yet."

"You were lucky," they added.

"Do you have any hope for the younger generation?" I ask

"Absolutely none."

See how it works?

 

"The old begin to complain of the conduct of the young when they themselves are no longer able to set a bad example."

François de la Rochefoucauld

 

Another common whinge between generations is fashion, though a little less so in Whistler. Whistlerites, by climate alone, have to be more practical in clothing choices but generational differences remain.

When I was younger, I remember my mother rolling her eyes like Linda Blair in The Exorcist at some of my outfits. Later, when I had a clothing store I would take her on buying trips and base my buying on her decisions. "Mom, what do you think of this?" I'd ask, holding up a funky top.

"It's vile."

"I'll take a dozen."

I was sure it was possible for me to stay hip to the latest trendy fashion, but sadly I have some questions about the truly awful clothing some of the young people are wearing these days. And I don't think I'm alone.

 

WARNING!               WARNING!               WARNING!                (Serious Rant To Follow.)

 

Hey young people! What ARE you wearing?

No, really, what the hell are you wearing? Those long, long baggy hoodies make you dudes look like mutant legless trolls. And baseball hats with a hood? Very gangster and just a tad overkill, don't you think? Just how badass do you have to be in the scary 'hood of Whistler?'

And how does anyone 'hook up' anymore?

I can't imagine being a girl in my twenties checking out a young man decked out in the skid-outfit so popular these days and being remotely turned on.

"Wow, I THINK his ass is hot, but I just can't tell," or "Mmmmm, I can't wait to run my hands through his sweaty, greasy hair after he takes his gigantic Dr. Seuss toque off."

True, it might be exciting to have absolutely NO idea what the guy's body looks like until his clothes are ripped off in a moment of inexplicable lust, but things could go very, very wrong.

Like: "Oh dear, when did you grow a tail?" or "Crap, you're legs really are that short."

This fashion critique wouldn't be complete without the pants around the ankles discussion. Why, oh why is this still the hot look?

And girls, why the bare feet in Uggs in the summer paired with a mini skirt? Is it to counteract the sweaty head under the Dr. Suess hat? Is it to fight head odor with foot odor when the clothes come off?

And this might just be a city girl affliction, but what's with the tiny mini skirts paired with six inch stiletto heels with no coat at -15C??? Sure it's highly entertaining to watch you totter over ice fields and snow drifts, but come on people!!!!

 

Rant Over. I feel better.

 

While a lot of young people I talked to claimed to hate this style too, the ones who embrace it have pretty weak excuses.

"The droopy pants are comfortable," explained one. "But I only do a minor drop, not the full drop. There's the dew drop, the half-drop, the one-third-drop and the full drop."

Explains one young lady: "I think it's to look completely gender neutral." (At least I think it was a lady)

But to be fair, I thought back to the clothing we wore in the '80's.....and yes, we definitely looked better. Our look was neat and preppy. Lacoste shirts, 501's and blazers. Oh, but wait- then there were giant shoulder pads, crimped, spiky, asymmetrical hair, multi-coloured florescent zinc oxide worn like war paint, parachute pants, high tops, shiny jumpsuits and earrings the size of our heads.

Hmmm, OK. So we looked stupid too. But at least we could run if necessary and you could tell what sex we were.

Isobel MacLaurin, 80, remembers her clothing style in her 20's. She writes from holidaying in Tazmania: "Since I am the oldest, not the wisest, of your group, I have many perspectives on costumes and fashions throughout the generations.

"For one instance, we skiers in the 1950's actually started the, ahem, ordinary folk on the streets, wearing ski jackets, ski pants, casuals and pack sacks. Until then, to work we wore skirts regulated two inches below the knees, nylons, high heels, hats, gloves, fitted jackets and coats, etc.

"Mind you, again in the 1950's, we were ever so sexy at Rock N' Roll dances in our high heels and little strap dresses, plus great tans from spring skiing. This so unlike the present ungodly wearing of jeans and T-shirts. At our cabin I still have old time ski outfits, and, my dear, as you will notice on the ski hills, the 70's and 80's have been re-invented. I adore telling the boarders that I wore those colours 30 very odd years ago."

Deann, 40, thinks Whistler fashion between the ages is ageless.

"Everyone wears fleece!" but then she gets a shot in, "the 40, 50 and 60-year-olds all look better in Lulu Lemon than the 20-year-olds because they're in better shape."

Amber, 31: "I'm just jealous that the younger kids are wearing fashions they didn't have to pay for!"

Iain, 21, when asked what he thought about the baggy clothes his kin wore: "They're not my kin!"

This sentiment was a common thread between the 20-year-olds. Nobody really admitted to like the aforementioned Badass Dr. Suess look. I thought I should maybe just find one of the creatures that wore that outfit, and ask them why they thought it was so great- but the look worked. I was too scared.

 

Whistler Parents and Their Kids. Ageless? Is the Gap Getting Smaller?

 

Amber, 31: "We're ageless. My parents act older than people their same age here. Whistler is just a little Bubble of 'Hee Ha!'"

Darryl, 48: "Whenever I feel a vibe from some kid that thinks I'm old, I just want to scream 'Don't you know I used to be cool?'"

He also adds: "Parents these days either don't take care of their own kids, or think they can be their kids buddies, or that their lifestyles won't change because they can plunk them down in front of a video game.

"You have to be a hands on parent, but oh crap, I have to cut this interview short the nanny's coming."

Personally, I forgot to have kids. I thought that this is why I still at least FELT so young. When you're not worrying and fretting over every little thing that your children say or do, and watching them march through years of birthdays, school and holidays, you tend to lose track of time and your maturity.

But still, Whistler turns out to be somewhat ageless in this category. My friends with kids in their twenties say that their offspring are happy to hang out with them because they've skied and biked and shared time with their parents more than your average city kid.

As Cheryl, 52, explains, "It's different here. Our kids include us in everything. They know that we, as parents, have a lot more experience in the important things they need to know about at this age. Like how to party. This is Whistler after all."

So they're finished with POTTY training and have graduated to PARTY training. (Get it?)

Ironically Cheryl and I, who are having a glass of wine at a bar, run out of money and start putting our change together in hopes that we can afford another glass. Cheryl wonders if she should go to her daughter's place of work and borrow some cash.

I discovered another bizarre occurrence that's unlikely to happen anywhere else. Whistler kids will actually call their friend's parents and ask them to go skiing, biking etc. Most people anywhere else on earth would find this amazing. Did I ever call my parent's friends and ask them to do something with me? Hell no!

However, there are times according to Dave, a Whistler dad of a 20-year-old, your kids will let you know you're old.

"My daughter picked up a picture of me when I was younger and she said, 'Wow dad! You used to be really good looking!' I think I was supposed to take that as a compliment."

Says another older local: "In Whistler you end up working with a lot of young people. It's just the nature of work here. In the city as you move up the career ladder, your peers are about the same age, but here you're working with kids in their twenties, so ages are more integrated and you invariably end up hanging out together, whether it's skiing or having a beer after work,"

This is true. I recall working at a retail store with a young staff and bristling at the fact that even though I was twice their age, with twice the experience, I was certainly not raking in twice the cash. But then I remembered that I beat them on real estate holdings. So I bought the beer.

Now- real estate. Now there's a bone of contention with younger Whistlerites. While interviewing a 60-year-old father and his two sons, aged18 and 21-years-old, the father mentioned that he had sold his Whistler house in the 90's, but had still paid $360,000 in rent since.

"Do you appreciate your father more?" I ask the sons.

"No I think he's stupid because he let the place go," said one.

"At least he had a place. I will never be able to buy a place here, even with the Housing Authority, because the wages are too low to afford anything."

This is a common complaint among the kids just getting started. But I think it must be great for the parents to have something to hold over their offspring's heads.

I ask Jane, 52, if she thinks her kids are nicer to her simply because they need a place to stay, and may eventually inherit the house in Whistler?

"Oh god, yes."

Win Win!

Also, it's good to stay close to your offspring. Who else is going to program your computer or cell phone?

(That is if they take their earphones out long enough to hear you ask.)

But Do We LOOK Ageless?

"The only time you look forward to aging is when you're a kid. You actually increase your age in fractions. "I'm 4-and-a-half!" When you're older, you'll never find yourself saying, 'Yup I'm 56- and-a-half!" George Carlin.

 

Monique, 45: "My Botox doctor said us sporty Whistler chicks have muscles like men in our faces so it is very expensive to grow old looking young in Whistler."

I once read that most people think they look a few years younger than they really are.

Very disheartening. I was sure I did too. But there is something about Whistler. Some people never seem to age but I suspect they have a Dorian Grey painting in their attic. And everyone who's older says they feel young until they look into the mirror. Oh sure, you can jut your chin out to look less jowelly, pull your cheeks back to make the eye bags disappear, but find a picture of yourself taken when you're unaware a camera is around and yowza! It's official baby! You're getting' up there!

And speaking of babies why is it that when woman here have babies or grow older, in complete defiance to the laws of nature, they LOSE weight?

Whistlerites do tend to look younger, and for the obvious reasons. We're surrounded by incredible beauty, we can get outside and take advantage of the many recreational amenities in seconds and our commute to work is, on average, seven kilometers away. We're just, in general, happier.

Carson, 60. Nickname: Snowpig

"People are often just playing bridge at this age, not skiing everyday.

"And I know how to relax as well, at 33 1/3 rather than at 78. And if you get that, you're old!

"I also enjoy the rivalry between the geriatrics, it's so entertaining. On the ski hill it's hard to tell who's old or not with the hats, helmets and goggles. I can only tell the older people apart by their huge dentured smiles. And yes, they can still ski my ass off."

Iain, 21: "Whistler people are pretty ageless. But I can identify an old person if they have to give exact change. I just want to tell them, 'you're giving me more change than I was going to give you.' And older people are quite often heavily perfumed."

Tom, 24: "Some old people wear their pants too high. Your pants shouldn't double as a man bra."

It's been said that once you reach a certain age, you realize that you'll never look 'young' again. You can look good for your age, and you can be healthy and happy, but you'll never look 20 again. And that's OK. It's liberating not to care so much anymore.

And that's when the jokes start. Like:

I cannot see I cannot pee,

I cannot chew, I cannot screw,

Oh my god what can I do

My memory shrinks, my hearing stinks

No sense of smell I look like hell

My mood is bad, can you tell?

My bodies drooping

Have trouble pooping,

The golden years have come at last

The golden years can kiss my ass.

Or:

"I don't know what my doctor looks like anymore- she's always behind me."

Or finally:

"I like to feel as young as possible, young men, that is."

So it would appear that, yes, Whistler is generally ageless. But what cinches it this fun discovery.

Every generation approved of marijuana! Now that's Whistler.

 

 



Comments