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The Maxies for 2006 go to…

What a year it’s been, eh boys and girls? With the quite understandable annoyance of stumbling into a Conservative government, albeit of a minority persuasion, early in the year, 2006 was the kind of year that can come back and visit any time it want
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What a year it’s been, eh boys and girls? With the quite understandable annoyance of stumbling into a Conservative government, albeit of a minority persuasion, early in the year, 2006 was the kind of year that can come back and visit any time it wants. There was singin’ in January, singin’ in December and a whole lot of moanin’ in between but what the heck, would we have it any other way?

Naturally, there were some things that were deserving of recognition so let’s get right to the envelopes. Winners of a coveted 2006 Maxie are….

Best On-Mountain Improvement, Man-Made Division : On a clear day, you can see forever. On a foggy day, at least there’s trees. Redubbed Symphony Express, the first really new lift in a decade didn’t open up all that much new terrain but it sure made what was there a lot more user-friendly. And on a busy December day, when the lineup at Harmony looked like Woodstock, we skied right onto Peak Chair. Oh Joy.

Best On-Mountain Improvement, Mother Nature Division : Snow. After r#*!ing to the top the week before last Christmas and threatening to turn Whistler in to Jonestown north, the snow came on Boxing Day. 111cm during the last week of December was followed by 461cm in January, a record for that month. Neatly bookended by a record snowfall in November was a great season, a balmy summer and just enough liquid sunshine to keep things from catching fire. Remember, there are going to be a few winners in global warming. Why not us? We’re deserving.

Best In-Village Improvement, Virtual Division : Fortunately for us, there are four places Whistleratics will never get to visit… and never have to pay for. The Frozen River, The Mountain Tent, The Solar Rink and everybody’s favourite, The Sunny Island were given a decent, if prolonged burial when council regained its sense of direction and backbone and bit the bullet. Save the bullet, guys, we’ll need it later.

Best In-Village Improvement, No, Really Division : I think it was Oscar Wilde who said, “We’ve established what you are, Madam. Now we’re just quibbling about the price.” Guess $6 million bucks seemed like a better price than $9 million for the two swing votes that it took to greenlight the Muni Hall expansion and renovation project. Too bad. It seemed like such a good opportunity to explore the kind and size of local government we’ll have after the Olympics™. Oh well, at least there’ll be plenty of labour to complete the job, no real inconvenience to staff and, of course, no chance the budget will bloom into Library North… right?

Say It Ain’t So, Joe : “The objective isn’t to sell off our assets.” Guess who said that? That’s right, our own Joe Houssian, former CEO of Intrawest. Joe said that in early March after announcing the company had engaged Goldman Sachs to explore “strategic alternatives” for the company. The Pirates had Joe by the short ’n’ curlies; the writin’ was on the wall. “I’m outta here.” Guess who said that? Oh sure, it was seven months later and a Fortress mentality was descending on our happy mountain home. Oh what the heck, we knew it was coming. At least he didn’t sell out to Disney. Enjoy your retirement, Joe. You deserve it.

First Annual Donald Rumsfeld Memorial Award : “You go to war with the army you have, not the army you wish you had.” What could be more inspiring? Almost as inspiring as, “We did the best with the resources we had,” which seemed to be the official explanation for last week’s slapstick performance by the RCMP on the Sea-to-Sky parking lot. Yes, it was the bad judgment, lack of driving skills and inadequate equipment that “caused” the imminently foreseeable snarl. But it could quite possibly have been avoided with timely check points at each end of the highway, a “lesson” we learned — again — just a couple of seasons ago.

Best Political Move, Municipal Division : Whistler council showed good judgment, political smarts and decisiveness in abandoning their decision to move forward with a public-private partnership to build the waste water treatment plant expansion. That it took over a year and 1,400+ signatures to untwist their arms are just messy details. It’s the final decision that counts… isn’t it?

Best Political Move, National Division : Little Stevie Hapless feeds yummy Rona Ambrose to the wolves of global warming with a made-in-Canada strategy to vigorously attack climate change… sometime in the next 50 years. Is it true his “scientific” advisors told the Dough Boy our children’s children would evolve to breathe CO 2 by then? I foresee a Liberal future.

Worst Idea of the Year : Tourism Whistler, the Hotel Association and the RCMP walk into a bar, have a drink and decide to nip late-night rowdiness in the bud by closing patios at, wait for it, 11 p.m. Naturally they don’t invite the patio owners to this party. Noise is life, guys. Life is what we’re all about here in Tiny Town. Most of those people are just having fun.

I Bitch; Therefore I Am : To all the former Whistleratics who just couldn’t leave town without one last whine in the Letters to the Editor pages. It ain’t the town that’s lost its mojo, it’s you, ya losers. If you wanna leave, leave. Your sorry attitude will follow you like crabgrass to your new home. The problem isn’t the place, it’s your own reality.

The Thrill of Victory : Tiny perfect Jenn Heil kicks off Canada’s Olympic™ party in Torino by stomping the other girls on the mogul hill. Sweeet.

The Agony of Defeat : Jeff Bean provides the best video moment of the Torino Games™ when not one, but both skis shoot off his boots like booster rockets at the apex of his aerial flight during practice. “Oh-shit; they’re both gone!” thought Jeff as he nonetheless completed his twists and flips and landed his jump.

It’s the People, Stupid : WSSF won’t be WSSF without Doug Perry. But I suspect it’ll still be the best damn party any ski resort throws in April with the very capable Sue Eckersley in command. But WSSF without the Party Dude? Weird. Scott Kittleson finally gets approval to bring local radio to Whistler. Now all he needs is the rest of the dough to make it happen. And Betty McWhinnie is both citizen and shitdisturber of the year for her tireless advocacy, volunteering and, in no small measure, helping put all those names on all those petitions that led council to making that really good decision. You guys make this place, well, this place.