Maxed Out

By G.D. Maxwell Dreary : gloomy, dismal, sombre, bleak, miserable, cheerless, joyless, uninteresting. In the midst of Thesaurus-abuse, we stop to ponder the soul-sapping power of ceaseless, endless, perpetual, neverending, B.C.

By G.D. Maxwell "My dog’s better than your dog, My dog’s better than yours." Zippy the Dog made me say that. It’s a jingle he heard on television once and still hums. Zippy likes to think he’s a "good" dog.

By G.D.

By G.D. Maxwell Finally! An explanation that makes sense. Ten years ago, I quit a perfectly good job that paid me more money than I ever thought I’d make.

By G.D. Maxwell "War is hell," is what I thought I heard him say.

Since I hope one day to be able to cross the border into the United States without undergoing a body cavity search, I’d just like to make my position perfectly clear: I am not ashamed George W. Bush is from Texas.

By G.D. Maxwell Welcome to Spring Break! If you live in Whistler, you’re probably thinking, "Hey, didn’t we have spring break during the entire month of February?" Yes. Yes we did.

By G.D. Maxwell Okay, now I’m worried. Last week it seemed as though the whole Olympics thing was more or less in the bag. I was convinced, not to say fatalistic, the Games were ours to lose.

By G.D. Maxwell Between William Shakespeare and Mark Twain I sometimes think all the good lines have already been written.

By G.D. Maxwell "Hain’t we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain’t that a big enough majority in any town?" Mark Twain, from Huckleberry Finn Well, I guess we’ll know for sure tomorrow.